t’s that time in the process of getting sick where my nose is only slightly clogged, except when I wake up when it is fully clogged. Well we performed for the middle school today, and they were possibly the worst audience ever. Even worse than the 8th graders from the year before. Or the year before that!

I’m noticing that I’m gaining some weight. I mention it to anyone and they laugh at me, but I know when I’m gaining weight and it’s definetely now. Well, after this weekend there will be some changes. New haircut, new running/walking excercise everyday, and new music. I need to start writing again now that I have a fucking awesome guitar.

I’m kinda worried about Filesharing… kazaa and all that. I hope it doesn’t shut down cuz that would sure fuck my life up for real. And honestly, if Napster is going to open back up as a pay service, I’d definetely pay, if it got back to the status that it was at when it closed.

I left school at like 2 today, which was really nice, came home and rested. I’m going back to school in a few minutes to get Christine so I can see her for a few minutes. I’m praying that once the show finishes there will be less annoyances and more good times. I wanna see the guys a lot more. PJ and I were discussing how when we all leave for college, our friendship is basically done. It’s not like we’re not gonna have a good time when we see each other during breaks… but it’s hard to stay connected when you’re away for so long. If he goes to MC and chills around these parts next year though, I’ll be seeing him a lot more which is really good. And Mariam might be at UMD, which’d REALLY be awesome. So funny that I met all these people while being in High School and now we’re all almost in college.

Just reading some more headlines and emails about war stuff. There was this one thing going around to protest the war… and some sent back a letter saying that protesters were wasting their time and that they should realize what the war is about, yada yada, etc. I still don’t have enough knowledge to go one way or the other, but I guess preventing another attack on the US is a good thing. Then, some people are saying that this whole thing might just help to spur attacks. Once again… I have no idea what to think. It’ll probably be that way until the end of the war. Unless it lasts until I go to college… probably just being at AU will help me get more politically oriented. Politically oriented? Is that correct?

I’m going to leave now to go back to school and pick up my sister and Christine. Maybe I’ll write more tonight. Fuckin MIracles was cancelled again last night! I hope it isn’t cancelled forever… I freakin’ love that show.

Found out today that my aunt has cancer. It still sounds like make believe to me, and I can’t really process the thought of her actually having a disease like that. It’s cancer and also I think there’s something wrong with her lungs. It’s like 2 diseases in one. I’m not trying to be dramatic or anything but she’s seriously one of the only family members on my dad’s side that I actually like. The cancer has spread so it’s like, if they can’t treat it, they just have to wait. It’s a sad day for my dad, it’s not his sister, although I call her an aunt, it’s actually his cousin. She taught me how to play rummy.

Look at this. There’s a war going on in Iraq, my aunt may be dying… yet it’s 75 degrees outside and there isn’t a cloud in the sky. Confusing really, the contrasting weather to the situations presented.

On a lighter note, I really wanted to go chill out on my deck today, it was so nice. Instead, Christine and I spent the day indoors. But it was my fault.. my legs hurt and I suggested not going outside.

Went to McD’s with Billy to get some icy cream and he got some foody food. Stupid rule there, he won a free McFlurry and gave the coupon to me, but they wouldn’t let me use it till the next time I went to McD’s. Yo, it’s 11:11. I hope I win a playstation 2 with my McD’s winnings.

Not much else to say. Missed half of American Idol to talk to my girlfriend online and didn’t regret it whatsoever. Although I did kinda want to see Reuben and Clay. Kimberly Locke was INSANE though! Jesus Christ that girl has pipes. She sang Bonnie Raitt’s I can’t make you love me… and it was earth shattering.